


If

by RoseCathy



Category: Red Dwarf
Genre: M/M, Oral Sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-08-20
Updated: 2014-08-20
Packaged: 2018-02-13 22:11:59
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 586
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2167053
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RoseCathy/pseuds/RoseCathy
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Fill for the <a href="http://starbuggers.livejournal.com/317.html">Red Dwarf Kink Meme</a> on LiveJournal.<br/>Prompt: “Rimmer giving head to a dozy, sleepy Lister.”</p>
            </blockquote>





	If

**Author's Note:**

> Can be read as a lost moment from [First](http://archiveofourown.org/works/1231249/chapters/2524393).

If things were different, this would all be more familiar.

Rimmer wants to do this, of course. Ached to try it the first time and aches to do it again (and again) thereafter. He likes the slide and twitch of hard flesh against his tongue, the mix of alarm and triumph he feels at the end. And the _sounds_ , always the sounds, which implant themselves in his memory and make him shiver when he lies awake at night.

If he has a complaint, it’s that Lister is too restrained, whether out of courtesy or wariness. In an ideal world, there would be no restraint. They would be on and in and around each other joyfully, irrevocably. He would welcome hands forcing his head further down or hips forcing Lister’s cock further up, because he’d know exactly what to do.

Not that there have been any negative comments, but he has doubts.

At the moment, he’s getting even less affirmation than usual. They were both about to fall asleep, or so he thought until one of them (he can’t remember who) pressed a soft kiss to the other’s collarbone and one thing, in that terribly cliché way, led to another. He feels wide awake, which is perhaps for the best given what he’s doing. Lister, on the other hand, doesn’t display many signs of alertness aside from the odd sigh.

If only it hadn’t taken so long for them to get together. Then Rimmer’s simulated heartbeat wouldn’t be so painfully out of sync with the rhythmic slide of his lips.

He doesn’t sense the fingers at first. They stroke lazily along his neck and tug at his hair — gently, then not so gently when he takes a deep breath and swallows. And again when he whimpers at the sudden change of pace.

Lister’s breathing gets more eager as Rimmer pushes his own head down to take him deeper. If Lister won’t do it to him, he thinks, he might as well do it himself, relish the fact that this is possible to begin with. A fortnight ago, he was quite resigned to never knowing what it was like to be this close to Lister, close enough to wonder _If it were swollen and pulsing and buried inside him just like this, but not in his mouth_ \- the image makes him gasp and pull off, and he pauses for a few seconds to stare at the needy involuntary movements that are at odds with the rest of Lister’s body.

Lister actually raises his head then, bleary-eyed, to watch Rimmer start to stroke himself. He thrusts upward, entranced and vaguely aware that they might both enjoy it, and then the frantic motions he sees out of the corner of his eye take him by surprise, make him fall back hard on his pillow and come with a soft whine.

Some things are worth the struggle to stay awake. If he falls asleep now, he’ll miss the almost-too-much sensation of being licked clean. By Rimmer, who looks sleepy and sated now himself, who Lister hadn’t known possessed the capacity to feel so strongly about…

Rimmer watches as Lister settles back against him. In this, in the way they go to bed every night, he already has more than he could hope for, but not everything, not yet, _maybe not ever_ — and something twists sharply in his chest. If only the sleep-drunk murmur in his ear hadn’t been gratitude.

If only he had heard the words he can’t say out loud.


End file.
